To be truthful, I had completely forgotten about the Lent season. I don't always go to Ash Wednesday services or anything. Or give something up/take something on during these 40 days. But this year, I decided that something needed to change and this season would be a great way to make it. For the next 40 days, I am getting rid of my negative self talk. Each week, I will pick something about me that I like, and talk about why I like it. We are often taught/shown that we can't like something about us. I don't really know why, but it's the way the world is working. I have very few women in my life that are happy with themselves. It's really sad, because they are fabulous people. I don't hang with anything less than the best. We get so caught up in beauty and waistlines, that we get lost in who we are, and that we're awesome.
Now, my challenge to myself has been tested this week. Several times. I have made this choice, and life is a collection of choices. We all have the want to be something, but seldom have any follow through. I don't want my future kid to think that they are never enough. Because they are always more than. I am more than enough.
This week, I decided that the part of me that I was going to praise this week was......my booty.
Crazy. Yes. My booty is pretty much what I'm known for. For many...many..(many) years, it was my nemesis. I would constantly plan how I would walk between desks at school, because I would clear them as I walked by. Buying pants, for-get-it. From busting out a pair of pajama pants at school, to never being able to find pants in a store, I just hated my booty.
After about 500,000 squats I've done in the last year, and my dance classes, I've learned to really appreciate it. And much to my surprise, people have been envious of it. They've asked if I could donate. Which on some days, I've greatly considered. I had a plastic surgeon tell me that people pay for a booty like it. It does make me about 5 inches taller when I sit down. I'm trying to find that perks. It's me and I'm tired of trying to hide it/smoosh it/griddle it, whatever I have to do to hide it. There's no need to do that anymore.
I hope in these 40 days that I change the way I talk to myself. And the way I think about myself. Don't want to advert my eyes every time I pass a mirror. Be able to take a compliment when it is given. Not wake up every day, and pep myself up to leave the house. Life is meant to be enjoyed. I'm created for fellowship and relationship. I know that my insecurities will disappear, but I'd like them to not be a forefront of my mind every day.
Just another step in this journey.